Dating Tips for Guys – Seek Value in Everyone
by Kurt Spelling
In today’s article I’m going to divulge one of my best dating tips for you guys to use. This is especially helpful for you guys, so listen up!
Today’s article is about something I call value seeking. First let me clarify, this is not the same thing as another popular term in the “pickup” community called value scanning. Value scanning is when you’re zoned out in the club. You’re not talking to anybody. You’re definitely not talking to girls.
You’re most likely sitting there with your drink or standing on the wall just looking around. You’re just staring around the club scanning for the fun (value) because you’re not bringing any of your own. That’s value scanning, and it’s totally different from value seeking.
Value seeking is a dating tip that actually revolutionized my own personal abilities with women. Lately, when I’ve been going out, I’ve been having my entire focus be on seeking value in everyone and everything. What I’ve found is that you find that value every time.
So for example, you might see two hot girls hanging out with some dude who looks “lame” or uncool.
“Why is THAT guy with those two hot girls?” you think as you make fun of him in your head. If you want to understand this dating tip, you need to completely x that out.
“Everyone is super cool and everyone is super fun.” That’s the proper mindset for being out and socializing.
I’m seeking value in every single person and every single thing. Instead of going up to that “lame” guy with the intention of making him look lame and stealing his women, you should be thinking “This guy is probably really cool and these girls are probably really nice and this drink is definitely delicious and this DJ is probably the best DJ I’ve ever seen in my life!”
Okay, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but you get what I’m talking about!
It doesn’t even matter if it’s true. When you look for that value and it in everything, you get that value sent back to you. With this attitude, everywhere you go you’ll instantly be friends with all the bouncers, bartenders. Even your first time there you’re getting special treatment from people who you just met because you see the value in them and you treat them as valuable people. It’s a mindset of pure positivity and it gets you results.
These are some of the best dating tips for shy guys available, because that’s shy guys problems! If you find yourself being shy, it’s most likely because you unconsciously expect people to be negative to you, as opposed to seeking value in everyone. If you can seek value in everyone, you’ll eliminate this non-self serving tendency for shyness.
It’s a monumental shift for you to make and will completely change who you are in this world. When you look for that value in everybody, you’re actually generating that value for them.
An easy way to integrate this dating tip into your core guys is to take a moment to stop and see a little bit of yourself in everybody else. We’re all the same really. We’re all the same people trying to do the same thing, have the same aspirations to have a good life etc.
We’re all the same.
Everybody makes these barriers that really mean nothing. He’s short. He’s tall. He’s black. He’s white. He’s rich. He’s poor. These are such minute and insignificant aspects when it comes down to what a person is. We’re all the same. Everyone is valuable. Everyone is fun. and
When you go out with that mindset and spread that kind of value, people will react to you in a whole new way. Have some humility and try to treat everyone as if they’re awesome! You’ll find that everyone treats you like you’re awesome too and everyone wants to be around you because you’re nothing but positivity.
So that concludes this dating tip for you guys. I you can see the distinction between value scanning (being lame and looking for fun) and value seeking (expecting everyone to be valuable and generating that reality everywhere you go). Remember, if you are shy it’s one of the quickest ways to start letting your real personality shine.
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